Anaconda (Irresistible Bachelors #1)

I have never been more dumbfounded by high reviews for a book in my life. Never. Come on…admit it…you\’re relatives and friends of the author…or young adults easily swayed. Or you like cheesy drivel for romance. I don\’t get it. I have never read anything so fast paced and so predictable about characters without any depth, whatsoever. I read 3-4 books a week, and never have I read anything so silly. Fast paced insta-love predictability, with cheesy dialogue and full of outdated cliches that made me groan. Gavin \”Anaconda\” Adams is a football player trying to branch into acting and doing a poor job of it. He\’s an arrogant, but charming manwhore that\’s lost his zest for women….until he runs into Brianna Sayles. And she awakens a fire in him that he thought was dead. All because she runs from him. Even though the writing of this story isn\’t that bad, it\’s not good either. It\’s a silly and predictable story of a celebrity who becomes fascinated and intrigued by the innocent and shy charms of a country girl. The plot has so many holes in it that I lost count. But, how old are our protagonists? A clue or a hint would\’ve been nice. And this guy is the main draw of a movie he\’s making…so WHY is he doing his own very real fight scenes where punches are not being pulled? He ends up in the hospital…and with good reason. THERE WASN\’T A STUNT DOUBLE! And does this author not know anything about anal sex? Apparently not because that whole scene was beyond ludicrous and had me rolling my eyes and slapping my forehead. I\’ve read insta-love stories before…but this took the prize for faster than a speeding bullet instantaneous. The humor made me groan it was so sad…and so not funny. Like, have you ever had someone tell you a joke that made you groan because it was just so dumb…and all you could do was stare at the person wondering if they were serious? Yeah…like that. Oh, and then…AND THEN…the book stops at 34%…but wait…there\’s another groaner story attached. Gads…I gotta wade through more of this drivel…

This was painful to get through. I am pretty stubborn and always finish a book once I start one, but finishing this one tested my patience. The characters feel like they are written by a teenager who has no idea what being an adult is like and is just making stuff up. The main characters are flat and unrealistic, as are the supporting characters. Bri is supposed to be primarily a college student working at the hotel part-time, but the entire book is spent with her working shifts at the hotel; not once does she attend class. At the very end, the author lets us know that Bri has supposedly been on break from classes this entire time, but by the time we learn this fact, it feels like an afterthought. Bri supposedly hates her job because her boss is such a jerk, but the few times they interact, he speaks harshly to her and not much else. Bri\’s back story isn\’t in the least believable and I don\’t understand the childish relationship Bri and her \”bestie\” have either; they are downright annoying together. My final issue is that the sex scenes are repetitive and boring. If I have to hear about how Bri\’s va-jay-jay \”clenches\” one more time, I am going to scream! God save me from half-assed and unimaginative love scenes! Add in the fact that this \”insta-love\” story takes place in 1 week and even my ability to suspend brief for the sake of a story has reached its limits. This is my first book by Ms. Landis and if this is the best she can do, it is the last one written by her that I will purchase. I encourage you to look elsewhere.

Book 1: Anaconda: Irresistible Bachelors Bk 1 Gavin Adams and Brianna Parker is the unlikely couple in this book but the spin the author put on this book, has made it one of my favorite books to read. Gavin is the famous football star/renowned celebrity that every girl wants to be with or just a sample of him, while Brianna is the girl down on her luck and working the odd jobs to make ends meet while putting herself through college. There story is something out of the quintessential Cinderella story without the wicked step-mother, then again Brianna\’s boss could be a replica for her wicked step-mother. This was a fun story to read with some really unorthodox but hilarious characters thrown in. Book 2: Blitzed: A Secret Baby Sports Romance This story started out with Troy Wood and Whitney Nelson as teenagers. He was the school star jock and she was the nerd turned cheerleader. Their love was unique and one incident as well as secret caused so much heartbreak for both of them, but just could not be helped. I must say that there were some really moving moments in this book for me, as well as moments that made me irritable. There were a bit unrealistic moment that had me wanting to scream bloody murder. But there were laughter too. Book 3: Addicted: A Bad Boy Step-brother Romance I enjoyed reading this story. Tyler is your spoiled rich guy and Victoria is the girl from a disfunctional or broken home trying to make something of herself in the fashion world. Their relationship was an unexpected one for both of them, but the dynamics of their love for each other and throw in the intense sexual chemistry between them made for a really deep and meaningful relationship. Due to the machinations of a few evil people in their lives, their relationship and feelings for each other was really tested

Another great book from Lauren the title is quite humorous but once you get into the story it turns into a lovely sweet tale which quickly becomes hot & heavy between the two main characters Gavin (Anaconda ) & Brianna ( Bri ) . Gavin\’s who is a famous football player and has been given the nickname Anaconda because an important part of his anatomy is very large , has now decided to turn his hand to acting . During the filming he\’s staying at the hotel where Brianna works part time as a maid . Brianna gets an eye full of the Anaconda so to speak , when she goes to check that everything was in order in penthouse as it was not supposed to be occupied until later in the day , not realising that Bri is in the room he comes out from the shower totally naked . Bri is thoroughly embarrassed and after apologising she runs out of the penthouse but they both realise there was an instant attraction between them and well you can guess the rest . Throw in a loyal best friend called Mindy that works in the coffee shop and really horrible hotel manager who is not very nice to Bri or Mindy and you get a really enjoyable story with a perfect ending .

Another brilliant story from Lauren. Brianna\’s gone up to clean football star Gavin\’s hotel suite before he\’s due to arrive, but he\’s already in the shower when she enters the room. She stands there with her mouth open, not believing what she\’s seeing when Gavin comes into view, butt naked apart from the towel that he\’s drying his hair with. Hearing a gasp he pulls the towel from over his head to see Brianna, hand over her mouth, running from the room. Intrigued, he sets out to find her and the battle of wills begins. Enjoy this as its well worth the money and more.

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