Friend & Foe

I’ve read quite a few popular psychology books from both sociological and business perspectives, and often do so to further understand the connections between the deeper academic content the books are based on. In the case of Friend & Foe, Galinsky and Schweitzer provide a flowing, comprehensive, and fascinating narrative on top of a difficult set of concepts. I highly suggest the book for anyone generally interested in social psychology, as well as those looking for evidence-based stories that teach the ins and outs of navigating difficult social tasks that often occur in business and politics.

Please note: This book implicitly requests a commitment from the reader to understand and think about the context behind why people cooperate or compete. While the information alone is interesting, only those who treat Friend & Foe as an intellectual endeavor will truly learn and thus benefit. So, if you’re looking for a quick list of “how-to” statements, you’re looking at the wrong text. However, you’ll gain so much more reading this narrative crafted by topic experts than any such list you find online.

I enjoyed this book – I can’t believe how quick a read it is and really appreciate the care the authors have invested in making academic research intellectually accessible to the time-strapped and instantly applicable to everyday business. What I am particularly grateful for is the discussion on hierarchies and power differences – these are sensitive topics that even the most self-aware business people are leery of approaching but are total roadblocks in decision-making and team happiness – everyone comes up with their own heuristics on how to handle this and they are not apt for every situation so nuanced recommendation of perspective-taking not merely of others but the task at hand – is it brainstorming? is it execution? are valuable ways to move forward without being mired by people issues. I think it was brave of the authors to treat the subject with such directness – the only other author I have read who discusses things as frankly is Peter Thiel and this is no mean comp!

Friend and Foe provides a great guide on how to navigate our world with all its complexities and dynamic changes. At the core of our work is the relationships we have with our colleagues, whether equals, bosses or employees. The best “win” is when we can develop these relationships to achieve a goal. Adam Galinsky and Maurice Schweitzer have put together a book where each chapter builds upon the previous chapters to highlight critical take home messages on how we behave in the real world and ways we can improve our outcomes. (I have already incorporated the power position to get myself ready for a big meeting.) The book is easy to read and does a great job of combining real world stories with research either completed by the authors or other experts. From the beginning of a relationship to the completion of the deal, this book provides helpful guidance on how to successfully compete in today’s world but also how to live within it. These lessons are not just for the workplace but will help you in your life outside of work, as the authors point out throughout the book. Finally, as a father of 3 daughters, I will be sure to suggest each one reads the chapter on being a woman in the workplace.(Chapter 4) The authors have done a great job of highlighting the inequalities woman face but also offer strategies on how to hopefully gain some equal footing.

Although many of the ideas the book explains seem logical after you read them, I believe it is one of the few books that systematically discusses this topic of cooperation and cooperation, the key idea being that every human interaction is a dynamic combination of both. The book is easy to read yet offers good insights and backs up its advice on different studies duly referenced. I would definitely recommend it to anyone that wants to understand better how to interact not only in negotiations but in everyday life.

I truly enjoyed reading this book! The authors are great storytellers and they rely on solid scientific research to offer some very valuable insights on how to compete and cooperate. If you like books like “Thinking Fast and Slow,” “Predictably Irrational,” “Give and Take” and other great ones on decision making and interpersonal relations by well-established and reputable scholars, then you will love this one too. Enjoy!

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